


Give & Take

by Anonymous



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Alpha/Omega, Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Curses, Everyone Thinks They're Together, Full Shift Werewolves, Heavy Angst, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Major Original Character(s), Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Pack Dynamics, Slow Burn, Soul Bond, Swearing, Takes place in the United States, Temporarily Unrequited Love, Werewolves, Wolf Pack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-14
Updated: 2019-01-03
Packaged: 2019-08-23 06:48:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16613963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Calum was unsure about a lot of things in his life. School, friendships, the like. What he didn't need, on top of all of that, was the new stresses that came with pack life, something that he had been thrown into with no warning.And, for the cherry on top, his new alpha hated him with every fiber in his being. And Calum hadn't even done anything to the guy.So, one could say, things were just peachy for Calum Hood.





	1. In My Blood

**Author's Note:**

> if you didn't read the tags, this takes place in the United States (but you can still imagine them with Australian accents if it makes you feel better) 
> 
> AU - American Accents lmao

"Are you excited to turn 16?" Luke asked.

"Not really," Calum admitted. The two were laying on the former's bed, staring up at the ceiling. "I still don't know if being in the pack is what I want."

"You don't really have a choice. Hate to break it to you, but a curse is a curse, they're kinda inescapable," Luke reminded him, as if it was something that Calum didn't already know. 

"The curse just says I'll become a shifter at 16, I don't necessarily have to join the pack. I could go rogue."

"If you went lone wolf you'd be dead in a week, tops. And that's being generous," Luke laughed.

"Glad to know that you have faith in me." Calum didn't know why he was feeling so nervous about shifting. He had known that it was going to happen for years, had had years to mentally prepare himself for it. 

"What's so bad about being in the pack anyways? You already know everyone in it." 

"It'll be different once I'm a shifter. Remember what happened to Michael? We used to talk to him all the time about everything, and now he's... distant. Sure, I've met everyone in the pack, but I don't  _know_ them. It's basically a cult. And even then, the only one I even know somewhat well is Michael. The rest might as well be strangers to me," Calum ranted. 

"Mike promised it would be fine. And hey, promise me that you won't get distant on me," Luke pouted, poking Calum's cheek.

"I'm going to be living here still, aren't I?"

"I thought you had been offered to live at the pack house?" Luke sat up.

"I don't know if I'm comfortable with that big of a change in my life. Besides, the only people that live there are Ashton and Kyle, not even the entire pack. Unless your mom wants me out, I'd like to stay," Calum said.

Calum had been living with the Hemmings family for quite a few years now. It was a bit of a long story, but to sum it up, Calum had a blood curse on his mom's side that she hadn't bothered to tell Calum's dad about before she passed away in a car accident. When Calum's dad had been informed of it, he distanced himself from Calum, their relationship becoming strained. The final straw was Cal coming out to him as gay, resulting in his father calling him a "freak of nature" and getting disowned and kicked out of the house at the ripe age of 13. 

"You know she loves you like a son, dude. She would never force you out," Luke reassured him. The two had been best friends for years now, ever since grade school. Luke was basically a brother to him. It also helped that they shared the same curse, thanks to the fact that their ancestors had fucked up big time a few generations ago. Nothing to bring a pair of friends closer than sharing the same harrowing affliction. 

"It's going to be okay tomorrow. And, if it's any consolation, I'll be joining you in a few months anyways. You won't have to go long before we're both monsters among men." Luke smiled, patting Calum's shoulder.

Suddenly, there was a knock on Luke's bedroom door. Liz, Luke's mom, poked her head in.

"Calum, Ashton's here for you. Are you packed?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'll be right down. See you tomorrow, I guess," he said to Luke, who gave him a weak smile.

"See you tomorrow." 

-

Calum had only met Ashton a few times, most of them being in recent months as they talked about Calum's upcoming shift. Ashton was the pack alpha, the leader of sorts. It was his job to help get the new wolves acquainted, teach them the pack laws that everyone was obliged to follow. 

"There are other shifters, but you will rarely come across them. We have our own territories, and shifter law states that we're all to respect each other's boundaries and to never trespass. You must always ask if you need to pass through another shifter's territory. Calum, are you paying attention? Now, remember, shifter law is different from pack law. Pack laws were made by the founding members of the pack..."

Basically, there were just a lot of rules. That was probably the worst part of the curse. Turning into a giant animal? Not so bad. All the rules that came with this ability? God awful. 

From what Calum had learned, because of the shifter laws, you lost a lot of your freedom. Your life was dictated by the laws, and there were life-threatening consequences if you broke them. Your entire life became about your pack, and nothing else. You always have to be conscious about how your actions affect the pack. And you should stay with your pack because your pack will keep you safe. 

Safe from what, Calum still couldn't figure out. Ashton hadn't really given him much time to ask questions during his lectures, and Calum didn't want to interrupt him in fear of making him mad. Ashton was a big dude, with big muscles, and he could probably eat Calum for breakfast. And, Michael had once said that Ashton had a terrible temper, and it didn't take a lot to piss him off.  

Grabbing his backpack, Calum hurried down the stairs, not wanting to keep the alpha waiting. Turning the corner, Ashton was stood in the doorway, arms crossed, silently looking around. Another one of the pack members, Cas, was standing close behind him, her stance just as tense.

Making eye contact with him, Ashton let his arms drop to his sides. "You ready?" 

Cal simply nodded his head, words stuck in his throat. He couldn't help but have the intruding thought that Ashton was really fucking hot, something that always seemed to pop into his mind whenever they were together. Which was weird, and not helpful in his situation.

"Let's go."

And with that, the three of them left, starting the long trek through the woods, towards the pack house. 

-

The walk was twenty minutes of awkward silence, the only sound the noise of leaves crunching and twigs snapping underneath their shoes. At one point, Cas had tried to start some friendly conversation, but it had died almost instantaneously as she picked up on the fact that Calum really wasn't interested in small talk at the moment. He felt kinda bad because she was just trying to be nice, but his nerves were on fire with how anxious he was. 

"Well, we're here. It's just going to be us and Kyle, if that's alright. I figured you didn't want to be overwhelmed by the whole pack being here," Ashton said as they came across the small cabin. It was modest looking, with a small porch with some randomly assorted furniture on it, and a brick chimney with ivy climbing the sides. Following Ashton's lead, they walked into the pack house, everyone removing their shoes and leaving them by the door. 

Walking down some stairs, Calum found himself in the basement, a part of the pack house he hadn't seen before. All the times he had been here, everyone had stayed on the main floor, moving between the living room and the kitchen. There were also a few bedrooms and the bathroom on the main floor as well, but those were off-limits for sound reason. 

The basement... smelled. It had a concrete floor that was covered in mysterious dark stains, and there was a single mattress in the middle, a few old blankets thrown on top of it. There was a door that looked like it led to another room, but it was closed. 

"It's going to be okay. I'm the pack healer, and I promise you're safe here," Cas smiled, her expression soft. She was holding a wooden crate in her hands, but Calum wasn't privy to the contents inside. 

"Me and Kyle will be upstairs, checking in periodically," Ashton informed, before turning and going back upstairs.

"Make yourself comfortable, and try to get some sleep if you can. It's going to be a long night." Cas set her crate on the floor, sitting down on the edge of the mattress. Deciding he didn't really have much choice, he stripped of his shirt and shorts, laying down. Cas covered him with the blankets, humming a soft lullaby. Eventually, he succumbed to sleep, body relaxing.

-

Waking up was a mistake. Calum was in excruciating pain, his nerves screaming at him, telling him he was being burned, being stabbed, hurting. He was drenched in sweat, and he kicked the blankets off. His vision was blurred, but there were bright lights, and it made him slam his eyes shut, burying his face into a pile of blankets. He writhed, trying to get the burning feeling to go away, but moving made it worse. Forcing himself to stay still, thinking it would make it better, it didn't. Staying still was just as painful. 

He just wanted the pain to stop. Why wouldn't it stop? He cried out, hoping that someone would just come and kill him already and take him out of his misery. He tried calling out again, but the words were stuck in his throat, and instead, he let out an involuntary scream. The noise tore from his lungs, shaking him to his core. And suddenly, the agony was too much, and he passed out. 

 


	2. Givin' Up

"How's he doing?" Ashton asked the healer, who was wiping the sweat off of Calum's forehead with a damp washcloth.

"Honestly? He's woken up and passed out about five times now, and it's only been two hours. This is probably one of the worst shifts I've sat through in my entire life," Cas replied.

"Is there anything you can do for him?" The alpha knelt down next to the mattress that she was sat on, where the young teen in question was physically shaking.

"I've given him practically all of my turmeric and valerian supply, but he burned through it pretty quickly. Something's not right, Ash, I can feel it in my gut." 

Ashton, who had been watching Calum for most of the time, turned to look at Cas. She looked stressed, jaw clenched and eyebrows furrowed. At this point, Ash realized that she had been holding Calum's hand with the one that wasn't holding the washcloth. 

"Well, let's just wait and see. He's probably going to be fine," he reassured her, and she slowly nodded her head, but Ashton could tell she didn't really believe him.

-

A few hours later, and Ashton found himself standing in the basement with Kyle and Michael, with Cas still sitting on the mattress. 

"He should've shifted by now, Ash," Kyle said.

"It smells like piss in here," Michael commented, scrunching his nose.

"That's because he had a seizure about twenty minutes ago," Cas said from where she was sitting, snapping her head to look at the group gathered, "I think he's dying."

"He can't be dying, no one dies from shifting," Michael stated, but seemed uneasy at the prospect.

"No one in this pack. I've talked to other healers, sometimes there are abnormal shifts-" She explained, but was cut off by Ashton.

"And there's nothing we can do?" 

"I've tried everything in the book. Well, I could try using my magic, but it's unstable at best, and there are always consequences to using it..." Cas sighed.

"We can't just let him die, you have to try," Michael begged, looking at his friend's ashen face.

Cas let out a heavy breath, weighing her options. The whole room was tense with silence, everyone grim. Finally, she placed her hand on Calum's forehead, closing her eyes.

When she opened them again, they were a glowing violet color, the color of her wolf's eyes. 

"I can transfer someone else's energy to help heal him, but it's going to have to be some pretty powerful stuff," she finally spoke, making eye contact with Ashton. He nodded solemnly, walking over and sitting down next to her. Cas placed a hand on his shoulder, closing her eyes again, and began to concentrate.

Meanwhile, Michael was starting to feel queasy. This was scary, and he didn't do too well not knowing if Calum was going to be okay or not. 

"Have you done this before?" Kyle asked Cas, and she grimaced.

"On mice." 

Ashton's eyes widened in fear. He trusted his pack healer, but she had only been studying magic for two years, and elementary stuff at that. Healers were the only people in the pack who had the gift of magic, so it wasn't like he could help teach her. She was mostly self-taught, occasionally taking trips to nearby packs to study with their own healers. 

"Ash, just tell me if I'm taking too much. It's hard for me to gauge..." her voice trailed off, and her head tilted to the side, leaning closer to Calum. 

Calum, who had been pretty motionless for the past hour, with the occasional shallow breath. Sheen with sweat, hair sticking to his forehead, he was a few shades away from looking like a corpse. After a few moments, he gasped loudly, taking in a huge gulp of air. At the same time, Ashton's hands flew to his stomach, and he clutched it in pain. His eyes were glowing red, and filled with concern. 

"Cassiel-" he warned. 

"Just a little bit more," she replied, gripping the alpha's shoulder with more force. 

Michael took note of the color slowly returning to Cal's face, his breathing becoming more regular. Ash, on the other hand, was the one who was starting to not look so good. 

"Cassi, I think you need to stop," Kyle told his sister, but she ignored him. 

And then, Calum shot up from the bed, and Cas finally let go of both him and Ashton. Calum, sitting upright, had his face in his hands. Ashton was grimacing a bit, but looked fine otherwise. 

"Calum, are you okay?" Michael asked his friend, who finally lifted his head and turned to face the group. 

As their eyes met with his, a collective gasp was let out as they were met with his eyes, a shining gold. 

"You're an omega," Ashton stated, before promptly collapsing to the ground. 

-

"What's going on?" Calum asked, as Kyle was lifting Ash off of the ground.

"Give us one second, Cal, and I promise everything will be explained," Cas said. 

Michael helped Kyle start to carry the alpha up the stairs, out of sight. He looked back and met Calum's puzzled eyes, and wished he could stay for the explanation as well. What could he say? He was curious. He had only heard of omegas in passing, and honestly didn't know much about them. 

Cas had followed them, helping them get Ashton into his room.

"No matter what, he cannot leave this room, am I clear? If you have to use force, I don't care, do not let him leave," the healer ordered, before rushing back downstairs. 

"C'mon dear, let's go to the kitchen and I'll make you some tea." She smiled at Cal, rushing to help him when he went to stand up and his legs almost gave out from underneath him. 

-

"This tea, no offense, tastes like shit."

"And you're going to drink the whole thing if you want to feel better."

"Are you going to tell me what's going on?" 

"Yes. And before I do, I just want to say I'm sorry, Calum. I really didn't mean for this to happen."

"What did you do?" 

"You were dying, so I used my magic to make sure that didn't happen. Honestly, I don't know if it was my magic that did this per say, or if this was already your destiny... But, to put it simply, you're an omega."

"You say that like I'm supposed to know what it is," Calum countered.

"It's a type of wolf. Ashton is an alpha, Michael and Kyle are betas, and I'm a healer. Each one comes with its own abilities, and each pack usually has one alpha and one healer, and the rest are betas. However, in rare circumstances, an omega will present itself. I've only met one before you, and she's quite fascinating... I'm sure she would love to meet you sometime, if that's something you would be interested in," Cas explained.

"What kind of abilities do omegas have, then?"

"You have the ability to use magic, but in a more limited sense than a healer. And you can control betas, like an alpha voice, except it will also work on alphas. Omegas actually have a very high ranking in packs, they're second to alphas. You're going to be more important than me."

"Seems fake, but okay," Cal huffed. "Where's Ashton? Michael? I want to go home."

"You'll be able to, soon. But first, you and I need to have a serious talk with Ashton, and I have a feeling he's not going to like it."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wolf eye colors:  
> Alpha - Red  
> Beta (most wolves) - Blue  
> Omega (rare) - Golden yellow  
> Healer - Purple


	3. All I Wanted

"Why wouldn't Ashton be happy to talk to us? What aren't you telling me?" 

"Calum, there's this thing about omegas... There's this..." Cas seemed at a loss for words, pausing and looking out the window. The sun was just starting to rise, letting in rays in orange and pink hues shine into the modest cabin. 

"It's called a soul bond, Calum," she said, turning back to face him. "They're very rare, and very powerful. From my understanding, omegas' magic is unstable, and the soul bond to another shifter keeps it stable. But, omegas can only share this bond with one specific type of shifter, an alpha."

Calum scoffed, standing up from where he was sitting on the couch next to Cas, walking to the other side of the room.

"Okay, I have a soul bond, whatever. I still don't know what any of this means. Why am I different? Why didn't I shift into a wolf like I was supposed to?" 

"Calum, please, sit down. I promise I will answer all of your questions to the best of my abilities. I don't know why your shift was different, okay? But, you need to know this. Soul bonds are romantic." And the look that Cas gave him, revealed that she was truly sorry for him.

"Oh." He froze in place where he had been pacing, not really sure how to react to that information. 

"You and Ashton, once he wakes up, will get to talk about this more, and what it means. But it's going to be okay, alright? I know you have Luke and Michael, but I'm here for you as well, if you want someone to talk to about it."

"How do you know so much about this stuff anyways? I thought omegas were rare," Calum said, his voice weak. 

"They're rare, but there's lots of lore books about them, and I've met with healers that know some of the history surrounding them. I can lend you some of those books, if you think it'll help you."

"I think... I think that I just need some time to adjust," he admitted, sitting back down. 

"Hey boss," Kyle said, peaking his head around the corner, "Ashton just woke up."

-

"Play nice, Ash. Being a shifter is brand new to him and he hasn't exactly been having a normal experience so far, he's scared," Cas warned the alpha, but he stormed past her into the living room. 

"You need to find a way to break the bond," Ashton demanded immediately to the healer, and Calum shrunk in on himself. 

"The bond is unbreakable, dipshit. You're just going to have to learn to accept that," Cas stated, voice icily calm. She was standing with her arms crossed and head held high, ready for Ash's wild temper to take its toll. 

"I'm not- I'm not a fag!" he proclaimed, "I'm not gay, I don't care about the stupid bond!" 

"Ashton, dude, stop-" Kyle said, but Ashton cut him off with a low growl. 

"Get out, you don't have a say in this."

"Fine, whatever." Kyle left the room, going outside for some air. 

Ash was breathing heavily, visibly shaking with anger. 

"Magic doesn't care about gender, and it decided that you two were a good enough pair. Can we talk about this like civilized adults, now?" the healer asked, already tired of these antics, but also aware of how Ashton's attitude was negatively impacting the omega in the room. 

"Ashton, I-" Calum started, but seemingly lost his voice the second Ash's hazel green eyes snapped their attention over to him. 

"You're not gay either, right? We can take this up with the Council, and they'll find a way to fix this whole mess," Ash stated, ready to go out the door, when Calum decided it was now or never to speak up.

"I am, though. A homosexual. And seeing as I'm apparently bonded to a homophobe, whatever, go to your stupid Council and do whatever. I don't want to put up with your insensitive ass anyways," the younger teen declared, getting up from the couch, pushing past the stunned alpha, and going outside. 

"I'm not fixing this for you. Soul bonds are not to be taken lightly, so I would go put your pride aside for two seconds and go apologize to him," Cas stated, turning and leaving for another room. 

Ashton stood there, speechless, not entirely sure of what has just transpired. 

-

"You're back!" Luke cried, encircling Calum into a hug as he walked into the Hemmings' kitchen. 

Calum, having had a long night, immediately burst into tears. 

"Hey, what's wrong?" the blond asked.

"Everything."

-

"Dude, Ashton sounds like a jerk. Seriously, fuck him for saying that to you," Luke said. Calum was in his room, having explained the night's events to his friend as well as Michael, who had come over on a whim. 

"He has some serious anger issues. I'm sure once he cools down he'll apologize, Cal," Michael reassured him. "If not, I will punch him clean in the face if that makes you feel any better."

Calum was silent after this, staring up at the ceiling, lost in thought. To be honest, the prospect of hurting Ashton was not enjoyable in the slightest, and it made his chest ache at the thought. However, he didn't dare divulge this to the others, who were currently extremely pissed at the older boy. 

"I don't know," Calum admitted. "I think I just need some time to myself." 


	4. This is Gospel

Ashton hadn't apologized to Calum. In fact, they hadn't spoken since that morning, almost a whole week ago. Calum had been feeling like absolute shit the entire time, mentally and physically. He was throwing up all the time, and he had a pounding migraine 24/7. He was only hoping that his dick of an alpha was suffering as much as he was. 

Of course, he had been going to school with Michael and Luke like nothing was wrong. Ashton was a senior, so he would see him around school, but they avoided each other like the plague. Ever since his "shift" Michael had returned to spending time with Luke and him, avoiding a lot of the other pack members. To be honest, Calum was pretty sure that a lot of the members had absolutely no clue what was going on, but were siding with their alpha because of pack mentality. 

It was Friday, and Calum was sat with his friends in the library, seeing as it was their lunch period. Luke was currently dying over his math homework, and Michael was doodling in a notebook. Due to his headache, Calum was resting his head on his arms, wishing he could nap. Suddenly, he was startled by the sound of a chair scraping against the linoleum floor, Cas plopping herself into the chair. 

"There's a pack meeting today after school, in the pack house," she announced, putting her backpack on her lap and starting to dig through it. She pulled out a paper bag that was torn to pieces, and pulled out a gross, sopping moss ball that was being held together with some yarn. 

"What the hell." Luke had looked up from his algebra textbook at the smell. 

"For you," she smiled at Calum, handing him the funky mass. 

Taking it from her, Cal held it in his palm, and stared at it for a second. He could fell the pressure behind his eyes lessen, and his stomach start to settle. He sighed at the sudden relief. 

"It needs water every few days. Keep it on a plate with some pebbles and it should do just fine," she instructed, before getting up and leaving. 

"You know, I don't think I'll ever understand her." Michael watched her leave in fascination. 

"What is she again?" Luke asked, putting his book away, having given up.

"The pack healer. She mostly makes tea and other weird magic shit. Also, her tea is nasty. You know 'don't drink the Kool-Aid'? Don't drink the tea, that shit is deadly," Mike warned.

"I like her," Calum said softly, and the others fell silent. Cassiel was... eccentric. She wore a lot of Kyle's old clothes that didn't exactly match, and her dark hair was always messily tied back. She didn't really spend a lot of time around other people, and Calum kept catching her doing weird things (like taking a hatchet to a pumpkin in the Hemmings' backyard. He didn't ask). But, she would text him memes randomly throughout the day to cheer him up, and her tea actually did make him feel better. She had also been helping Calum work on trying to shift, because that was something he had yet to actually do. 

"What do you think the meeting is about?" Luke asked, breaking the silence.

"Don't know. We usually have them every week to go over stuff, check-in with all the pack members on daily life. Ashton's always pestering me about my damn homework, but the hypocrite isn't any better than me at actually doing it," Mike scoffed.

"I wish I could go. Being the youngest sucks," Luke whined. 

"Don't worry, man. Your turn will come in due time."

Calum stayed silent, lost in thought. He wasn't really sure how he felt about being in that room with Ashton again, even if they weren't going to be alone together. Was Ashton even going to address him, or pretend he wasn't even there?

-

As Michael walked with Calum through the woods, he could feel his heart in his throat. His was on edge, his whole body thrumming with anxiety. Michael didn't say anything, but Calum felt like the older boy could tell that something was off with him. 

As they got closer to the pack house, he could hear multiple voices traveling through the woods. Shouts of excitement and laughter, the sounds of heavy footsteps trampling over dead leaves and sticks. 

Once the building itself was in sight, Calum observed as pack members goofed around, tackling each other and wrestling. Being around the pack, he felt like a blanket of protection had been wrapped around him, giving him a strange, homey feeling. They didn't seem to pay him much mind as he stepped onto the porch, glancing at him out of the corner of their eyes before returning to their antics. 

Cas bounded up to him out of nowhere, handing him a white flower. 

"It's a gardenia," she whispered in his ear, before giggling and walking away, a certain glint in her eyes that he couldn't pinpoint. 

Looking at all the other shifters around him, Calum tried to remember their names. He knew Kyle already, having encountered him a lot, and recognized Andrew as the tall Asian sitting on the porch and eating an apple. He knew Jack and Ben because they were Luke's older brothers, but otherwise hadn't spent much time with them individually. Cindy, who was wrestling and pinning Kyle to the ground and not letting up, was Andrew's sister. There was another girl, but Calum couldn't remember her name for the life of him. She was dirty blonde and was caught up in a tag-like game with Ben and Jack, and Calum vaguely remembered talking to her once about the weather or something. 

"That's Grace," Michael said, watching Calum's line of vision. 

"Thanks," he mumbled. 

-

As the pack got settled in the living room for the meeting itself, Calum found himself sat on one of the two couches, squashed between Michael and Cas. Ashton was standing in the middle of the room, pensively looking out the window. _What a pretentious dick_ , Calum thought to himself.

Twirling the gardenia in his hand, Calum was half-paying attention when Ashton started rambling about territory lines and whatever. After about 15 minutes, he tuned back in, and Ash was still talking about something he didn't really think pertained to him. Looking over at Cas, he noticed she wasn't really paying attention either, she kept stealing glances at Andrew. Huh, who would've thought?

Michael looked like he wanted to fall asleep. Calum could not agree more. 

"And, finally, I would like to introduce everyone to our newest member. Calum, would you like to say a few words?" Ashton turned to him, and Cal hated being put on the spot, everyone staring at him.

"Hi, I'm Calum. Great to be here," he said awkwardly.

"As some of you may know, Calum here had an abnormal shift, so he will not be participating in patrols until Cassiel clears him as fit to do so. For his privacy, don't pester him about it, if he wants to share it with you he will, and that's an order. Alright, does anyone else have any other announcements that they would like to share with the pack?" 

Glancing at each other, no one said anything.

"Alright then, meeting adjourned," Ashton declared, and before he could even finish his sentence, people were shooting up from their seats, rushing outside to do god knows what. 

Michael was rushing right alongside them, betraying Calum and leaving him confused as he stayed seated on the couch. Cas gave him a wink before ditching him as well, leaving just him and Ashton in the room. 

They looked at each other for a brief moment before Ashton sighed, slowly moving to sit next to Cal on the couch, but leaving a decent amount of space between them.

"Calum, I'm sorry for my behavior. It was very immature of me, and I shouldn't have said those things. I haven't been a very good alpha, and I should've done more this past week to help you feel more welcome in the pack. I don't want to ostracize you, that's not my intention. I just need you to know that this... revelation, is hard for me. I'm not gay, so this soul bond was a bit of a shock for me. I even have a girlfriend, a human girl, so I obviously didn't expect something like this to happen."

"Well, sorry to inconvenience you," Calum stated, voice dripping with sarcasm. Ashton flinched, but Calum only partially regretted his words.

"Cal," Ashton sighed, "This week has been extremely hard on me. My sleep has been shit and I _feel_ like shit. I don't want the both of us to suffer because of me. I just... I can't do anything romantic with you. But I've been doing some reading, and as long as we have some physical contact every day, our bond should be fine, and we'll be able to carry on our lives like usual. If that's something you're interested in."

They stared at each other for awhile, Calum considering his options. Cas' moss ball thing helped, but he could still feel the ache like an itch in the back of his head, and he didn't know if he could put up with it much longer.

"Fine. On one condition, you stop being a homophobic jerk. You bash being gay even once and I'm out, I don't care if I suffer for it," the omega said.

"Deal, promise, whatever," Ashton agreed, before quickly reaching over and grabbing Calum's head. Both of them letting out a sigh, the pain disappeared. 

And, deep in his heart, Calum felt a tinge, a smattering, of hope. Twirling his gardenia once more, he felt content for the first time since his birthday. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> List of pack members:  
> Ashton - alpha  
> Michael - beta  
> Calum - omega  
> Cassiel/Cas - healer, Kyle's sister  
> Ben Hemmings - beta  
> Jack Hemmings - beta  
> Kyle - Cas' older brother  
> Cindy - beta, Andrew's sister  
> Andrew - beta, Cindy's brother  
> Grace - beta
> 
> Luke - hasn't shifted yet lol :/
> 
> fun fact about gardenias, they have magical attributions to attract true love


	5. Sweater Weather

Calum's weekend was weird, to say the least. 

Instead of spending it with Michael and Luke like he had originally planned, he had found himself staying overnight at the pack house for the entirety of it. There was a spare bedroom that was now dedicated towards him, at the end of the hallway. Kyle and Ashton lived in the cabin permanently, and Kyle was actually a decent cook so eating meals with them wasn't awful. 

Other pack members would stop in occasionally after patrols and hang out for a bit, many of them staying for lunch. They would have casual conversation with Calum, treating him like he had always been apart of this second family. 

Ashton had also been laying on the physical contact heavy over the course of the past two days, and it wasn't something that was missed. It was currently lunch on Sunday, and Calum could feel the eyes on him when Ashton's hand would linger on his shoulder for a little too long, and then he would rest it on Calum's thigh. However, no one said a peep, likely avoiding the alpha's famous temper. No one dares poke the bear. Or, wolf, in this instance. 

-

After lunch, everyone left, and Calum was sat on the couch, watching Kyle knit what appeared to be a sweater. 

"Wait," Cal said, after a moment of realization, prompting Kyle to look up at him. "If you live here, where does Cas live? I've barely seen her all weekend."

"Cas doesn't live anywhere. She moves with the wind," Kyle replied, going back to weaving the dark green yarn together. And if that wasn't the most whimsical and ominous answer, ever. 

"Healers are weird," Ashton spoke from behind Calum, coming around the couch and plopping down next to the omega, their shoulders brushing. 

"How so?"

"Every one you'll meet are strange in their own ways. They're magical, in the literal sense, and they all have their own abilities. Cas says that the trees whisper to her and give her knowledge, and you learn to not question it. But, she does spend her time all over the place. I'm 100% certain she's spending her weekend with Andrew," Ash explained.

"Shush, don't talk about my sister that way," Kyle groaned.

"They're going to start dating eventually, dude, it's inevitable."

The conversation kept going on for awhile, before Calum found himself growing tired. A fire was going in the fireplace, to combat the chilly weather outside. Head falling onto Ashton's shoulder, he was out like a light in a moment of seconds. 

-

"Dude, where were you all weekend?" Luke demanded the second Calum walked up to him at school Monday morning.

"I was at the pack house. I wasn't feeling too well so Cas had me stay there under observation," he lied.

"Guys," Michael appeared out of nowhere, "who's ready for their daily dose of high school drama?"

"We are?" Luke asked.

"Ashton just broke up with his girlfriend, and she threw a massive fit! Everyone's talking about it." 

"Jesus," Luke gasped, but Calum broke away from the group, walking with a purpose through the halls. Michael called after him, but he kept going.

-

He found Ashton surrounded by Kyle, Cindy, and Grace, the four of them deep in discussion. Before he could get to them, someone grabbed his arm, pulling him to the side.

"Not so fast, cowboy," Andrew said, turning him around and dragging him down a different hallway," Ashton needs to cool off, he's very angry at the moment."

"What happened?"

"Brianna and Ash were arguing because he didn't text her all weekend and instead of getting into it he broke up with her on the spot. It was spooky." Andrew waggled his eyebrows. 

"Jeez."

"Mmmhhhmmm. She stood there speechless for a sec and then started yelling and hitting him. It was very theatrical. Anyways, Ashton's wolf got all pissy because, yelling and hitting, so now the squad is trying to calm him down. I have a feeling you don't need that in your life right now."

"Thanks, I appreciate it," Calum said, meaning it. Andy smiled at him, and Calum noticed they were in a part of the school he wasn't familiar with, some weird back hallway with no one in sight. 

They ended up at a door with a piece of paper taped to it that had "Newspaper Office" scribbled on with Sharpie marker. Andrew opened it, and motioned for Calum to go ahead of him.

"We haven't had a newspaper in years, but I'm technically the Editor-in-Chief for it. So, welcome to the best hideout in the entire school. You tell anyone else about this, and I'll have Cassi make you get a horrid rash," the senior threatened.

The room was small, with a few computers and some filing cabinets. The walls were filled with what looked like student-done paintings of trees canvassing from floor to ceiling.

"Cassi, huh?" he said, pulling out a chair and sitting down. Andrew chuckled lightly, sitting across from him.

"Yeah..." Andrew was blushing and smiling, scratching the back of his neck.

"Why haven't you asked her out yet?"

"We've been friends for forever, I don't want to make her feel weird or anything like that."

"I think multiple people can attest that she has feelings for you as well," Calum advised.

"I know... She's just this free-spirit, and I have a lot of baggage and I don't want to weigh her down. Enough about me, though, how are things going with Ashton? I hope you don't mind, but Cas told me a bit about what you're going through."

"Is it wrong that I'm not upset at the fact he literally just broke up with his girlfriend? We spent a lot of time together this weekend, and I know that it's still pretty new to him, but I think that I'm starting to have a little bit of a crush on him, as childish as that sounds." 

"Well, that's the soul bond, right? It wants you guys to be together. Written in the stars, and all that."

"Yeah, I suppose."

-

Calum didn't really pay attention through the majority of his morning classes. He sat in his spot and kept catching himself daydreaming, his train of thought returning to the pack (and Ashton) multiple times throughout the next couple of hours. 

When it got to lunch, he went to sit at his regular table with Michael and Luke, but found that they weren't there. Instead, they were sat in the middle of the cafeteria, where two tables had been slotted together and most of the pack was sitting (save the few that had already graduated). Walking over, he went to sit down at an open spot next to Luke, when Ashton called his name.

"Calum! Over here." The alpha smiled at him, patting an open chair to his right. 

Resigning to his fate, but also felt butterflies of excitement at the prospect that  _Ash saved a seat for him. Dear god, Calum, you're such a girl._  He went and plopped down into the chair.

"How's your morning been?" Ash asked, his voice low enough that only Cal could hear him.

"Good enough. You?"

"A bit crazy."

Pulling his lunch out of his bag, courtesy Kyle, who apparently loved to cook for people, he started to dig in. The pack delved into conversation, some of the seniors complaining about some ridiculous English assignment, and the other end of the table talking about something Cal couldn't hear. 

He calmly listened to Grace rant about  _Moby Dick_ , when Cas, who was sat to Cal's right, tapped his shoulder, and handed him a tea bag. 

"You're going to want to brew this tonight and drink it before you sleep," she stated, before going back to reading her book full of weird symbols. She was pointing to certain ones and whispering to Andrew, who was listening intently. 

"More tea?" Ash questioned, looking amused.

"It's to dispel the negativity in my aura," he replied, recognizing the sweet scent of yarrow. 

"Of course." Ashton nodded, making comfortable eye contact with him. Tentatively, the alpha grabbed Cal's hand under the table, giving it a gentle squeeze before resting their joined hands on his thigh. 

-

Calum's entire mood came crashing down at the end of the school day. His last class was mathematics, so he was already pretty tired, but what he wasn't expecting once class was dismissed was to go out into the hallway, and find Ashton and his supposed ex locking lips. 

His chest heaved at the sight, and Cal quickly turned before Ash could see him, breaking off into a sprint down the hall. 

Ending up at the old newspaper office, he slammed the door closed. Sinking down to the ground and curling into his knees, he let the tears forming in his eyes fall. 

So much for thinking that Ashton could ever possibly consider dating Calum. What stupid, wishful, thinking. What a fool he was for hoping for love from a straight man. 

 


	6. Wherever You Are

"Mike, have you talked to Calum recently? He's been ignoring my calls and texts." Ashton looked tired, dark circles under his eyes. If anyone noticed the tremors in the alpha's hands, they didn't say anything. 

"I don't think he's feeling well. Cas has been MIA for the past few days as well," Andrew added.

"Who's Calum?" Briana asked from where she was sitting on Ashton's right.

"A new friend of mine," Ash replied curtly. 

"Shouldn't someone tell him he's being a complete idiot?" Luke whispered to Michael, who shook his head.

"He shouldn't be so dumb that he can't even realize that he's the reason that the both of them are hurting."

-

Calum, was, in fact, not hurting too bad. His magic moss ball, which had a technical name he couldn't remember at the moment, was helping keep the pain from the  hurting soul bond at bay. 

He hadn't run away, exactly. He just couldn't stand Ashton at the moment, and had decided he was going to take a long hike through the woods. When he left that school his day, he had dropped his bag and phone off at the Hemmings' house, slipped his ball of moss into his pocket, and taken off. 

Unsurprisingly, he ran into Cassiel sitting in a 20-foot oak tree about thirty minutes into his adventure. Jumping down, she had grabbed Calum by the hand and taken him to a clearing by a river, where they camped that night. They had a silent agreement that they were there to keep each other company, but Cal didn't want to talk about anything, so they didn't talk. 

At one point, Cas had shifted into her wolf, which had a dusty, off-white coat and glowing violet eyes. She had vanished for a couple of minutes, and returned carrying a dead rabbit. Shifting back, she made a campfire, and then made them dinner. She had been keeping them well-fed for a couple of days, and Cal was fairly certain he would have otherwise returned to civilization at this point if it weren't for her. 

Calum had been meditating a lot. He had thought the initial suggestion of it from Michael a few weeks ago when he was working on his shift, but he was determined to be able to shift into his wolf form before he went back to the pack. 

Which, he wasn't exactly sure if they were looking for them or not. Ashton most definitely wasn't that concerned, seeing that he had Briana now. 

-

"You guys, it's been almost a week. My mom is getting calls from the school at this point and they're only going to get more suspicious," Jack pointed out. They were all gathered in the pack house for the weekly meeting, and the air was tense with anxiousness. No one knew what to do.

"I think we need to go out and look for Cal," Michael stated. 

"Ashton?" Ben asked. The alpha was not standing in the middle like he typically did, instead sitting on the floor and leaning against one of the couches. The guy looked completely exhausted, and it was clear he was in need of a shower. 

"I just don't understand why he would run away without talking to someone first."

"Well, maybe if someone hadn't been dumb and gotten back together with their psychotic girlfriend." Michael was done with this immature shit at this point, mainly concerned with his friend's well-being at this point. There was no way Calum hadn't started starving to death at this point. 

"Shut the hell up," Ash growled. 

"You have a soul bond, dude, you can't go around messing with Calum's feelings and then ditch him for some human that doesn't even know what you are!" Mike stood up from his seat. 

"Wait, a soul bond?" another pack member questioned, but they were left unanswered.

"I wasn't messing with his feelings! I told him from the start that I wasn't gay! He knows that there's no chance between the two of us, so why would he be upset about my relationship with my girlfriend?"

"I'm honestly surprised you haven't already dropped out of school at this point, with how dumb you're being," Andrew commented, getting up as well. "You know that Cas is missing as well? I know that she is a bit of a transient, but what if they're hurt? She would've come back by now."

"Fine. We'll look for them. Everyone be back here by sunset." Ashton slowly pulled himself to his feet, moving towards the door. The pack followed cautiously, wary of his temper. 

But as they all gathered onto the porch, the last thing they were expecting was to see two wolves walking towards them. The first wolf was recognizable, a white wolf they had seen hundreds of times, while the other, a complete stranger. Eyes trailing over the jet black coat, it wasn't until Ashton noticed its golden eyes that the pieces clicked together in his head.

"Calum?"

-

After shifting back, Grace managed to get the pair some clothes as they once again gathered as a pack in the small living room. 

"Where have you guys been? Do you know how worried we were?" Ben demanded, and Cas gave him a light smile.

"If you would have looked, we were right by the river the whole time. And, our wolves kept us safe, so there's no reason to worry. We're here now."

Ashton had tried to reach for the omega, to touch him, but Calum had quickly pulled away, putting a considerable distance between the two of them. He could see how Ash was hurting, but he had to stay strong, and remember what his wolf had told him. He couldn't concede, he had to stay strong, just for a little bit longer.  

 

 


	7. Invisible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Graphic Depictions of Violence, read notes at beginning of chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> possible trigger warning for strong language, self-harm, suicide ideation 
> 
> National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255  
> Trevor Project Lifeline: 1-866-488-7386

-Two Weeks Later-

The pack hadn't had the same dynamics since Calum's disappearing act and consequent return. People were getting along on the surface, but the underlying matter of contention was yet to be addressed. 

Calum hadn't been completely avoiding Ashton, either. He had been playing nice, going to pack meetings and participating in patrols now that he could fully shift. He was just skirting around him constantly, making sure that the two were never alone or in a situation where they could have a conversation. Cal had a strategy, a plan, and he was going to stick with it if it killed him. The bond was strained because of it, and Calum was fighting some physical illness because of it, but whatever. 

Weird soul bond drama aside, it was weird finally being able to shift. No one had told him about the bond that he was going to have between him and his wolf, but it was something he was coming to appreciate. His wolf, who he called Wolfy and no one could stop him from calling him that, didn't exactly speak words to him, but found ways to talk to him nonetheless. It was like having a common sense filter, a second gut feeling that would offer another input. 

For example, Wolfy did  _not_ like Ashton's girlfriend. Anytime Briana was in the vicinity, Wolfy would get agitated. Calum hadn't particularly liked her to begin with, but hadn't developed as strong a hatred for her until he developed the ability to shift. 

Speaking of Briana, Calum was sat at the pack table for lunch, and couldn't stand that she was at the table as well. She thankfully wasn't sat next to him and was on the other side of the table a few seats away, though the omega still wasn't thrilled that she was there in general. She just... gave off bad vibes, as a person. Maybe Cal was a bit biased, sue him, but something was just off about her. 

It was hard to understand why Ashton had gotten back together with her. Maybe it was because he was adamant about holding onto his masculine, heterosexual image. Maybe it was because by dating an outsider he held onto his humanity. Maybe it was because he hated Calum. 

Calum stared at his lunch. He had only managed to take a small bite of apple, and that had made him extremely nauseous. He hadn't been feeling the greatest in general mentally more than anything, and that was taking quite the toll on him. He had been losing sleep, staying up late fixating on the thought of why he had to be cursed with a soul bond. All the lore books that he had read had said that it was a great thing, a wondrous magical bond. 

The lore books also talked about a thing called Rejection, where rejected soul bonds led to death, but didn't really get into the specifics of how they killed. Maybe it was like the physical sickness he felt when he was away from Ash for too long. 

"Rose and honey actually works really well for a sore throat." Calum's thoughts were interrupted as Cas spoke, but he realized the healer was talking to Ashton. "Roses also very high in vitamin C, and they have antiseptic and antibacterial properties. Of course, they've long been associated with love in Western cultures, but they have a lot of historical significance as well-"

"Oh my god, can you shut up?" Briana whined, and the entire table (including side conversations) fell silent as they turned to look at her. Andrew pulled a bag of popcorn out of somewhere, and starting sharing it with Grace. 

"Excuse me?" Cassiel sat up straighter, lifting her chin to hold direct eye contact with her. 

"No one cares about your flower history, I was just saying-"

"Sorry, can you shut up?" Cas interrupted her this time, her face breaking into a slight smirk. Ashton's eyes were darting between the two, not sure what to say. He wanted to defend his girlfriend, but he couldn't risk pissing off his healer. Pack code demanded respect towards healers, especially from their alphas, or he would be asking for hell. 

"Excuse-"

"No one cares that you're mean. Seriously, what's with the mean girl trope? Why can't we just all get along and be nice to each other? I've listened to you talk about your boring shit for two weeks now, pretended like it's somewhat interesting, but I start talking to Ashton, not even you, for a minute and you can't help but be a bitch about it?" 

"Sis snapped," Luke whispered to Calum, and he had to fight back a giggle. 

Briana looked like a fish for a few seconds, her mouth opening and closing, speechless. She looked to Ashton, who looked just as stunned. 

"Aren't you going to say something to her?" she asked her boyfriend.

Ash turned to Cas. "Was that necessary?"

Cas audibly scoffed. "You're really fucking dumb, Irwin. Consider this my resignation." 

Getting up from the table, the entire table watched as she calmly stood up, and strolled away.

"Resignation from what?" Briana questioned, but no one answered her.

-

 

Like that, the pack was healer-less. Cassiel had disappeared off of the face of the earth. Kyle said that she had graduated early, apparently having more than enough credits to do so, and vanished. 

Andrew and Kyle had been passive aggressive towards Ashton ever since, both worried about the girl. 

"Ash, I think we need to talk," Cal said after a few days. It was a Thursday night, and the pack house was dead silent. Calum knew for a fact that Kyle definitely wasn't staying here at the moment. 

"About what?" the alpha snapped, and Calum flinched at his tone. 

"I think you need to break up with Briana. It's tearing the pack apart, and it's not worth it. There are other girls, or whatever."

"You think I should-" Ashton stood from where he had been sitting in a lounge chair, suddenly face-to-face with him. "No, Calum, I think you're trying to sabotage my relationship."

"As the pack omega, I have the right to give advice on how you should be leading your pack. And right now, I'd say you're doing a pretty shit job."

"Fuck you. You're just jealous. You've probably been going behind my back and turning everyone against me, haven't you? You got Cas to take your side, even though she was supposed to be MY friend. You're just insecure in yourself and the fact that you've never been in a relationship, right? The whole running away thing, that was just to get people to sympathize with you, you fucking attention whore. Just do everyone a favor and  _leave._ You've been a problem for me ever since you shifted, and I don't want anything to do with you, I don't want to deal with you and your problems anymore." Ashton was yelling, his eyes glowing red. Whether he knew he was doing it or not, Calum could feel it, the alpha command. Ash was ordering him, and Cal couldn't fight it, his nature giving in to the command immediately.

"As you wish," Cal stated, no bite behind his words. He turned and left the cabin.

-

Calum walked to the clearing by the river, where he had felt at peace with himself so many weeks ago. He felt at peace now, even though his wolf was screaming at him that something was wrong. But his limbs were moving on autopilot, and he couldn't stop himself. 

Laying down by the river, he watched as his fingers slowly formed into claws, and the first thought popped into his head.  _Ashton will never want you. You should just make it easier on him and fix the problem for him. That's what he said he wanted._

And as his own claws started to dig through his own flesh, blood falling onto the dirt, Cal realized he understood the Rejection now. But it wasn't like there was much he could do to stop it now. 

 

 


	8. Valentine

Ashton shot up from the couch with a gasp, startling himself awake. He had taken a nap after everyone had gone home, after Calum's explanation of how he had finally shifted after meditating with Cas by the river for a few days. 

"You good?" Cas asked from the couch opposite to him, where she was sipping on a cup of tea.

"What was that?" Ash asked out loud, and Cas gave him a pensive look.

"Bad dream?"

"Yeah... You could say that." The alpha was starting to calm down a bit, and he leaned his back against the couch.

"You know, dreams are the way your brain interprets and sorts your memories. But with shifters, sometimes our dreams can be a bit prophetic. Stuff like that shouldn't be taken lightly," the healer commented, tilting her head back as she finished her drink.

There was a comfortable pause between them, before Ashton made his decision. Grabbing his phone, he got up to leave.

"Heading out?" Cassiel called after him.

"I gotta go break up with Briana, _again_."

-

Calum was with Michael and Luke at Target, the trio bored and looking for a way to pass the time. They were in the grocery section getting random snacks and throwing them into the cart, when something happen. It was a minuscule change, barely noticeable, but it made a difference to Cal. It was like the air around him was suddenly lighter, like it was a little easier to breathe again. It was... strange.

He didn't mention anything to the other two, not thinking much of it after the moment passed. They went and purchased their items, and then made their way back to Luke's house (by the time they got there, half of the stuff they had bought had been consumed). But as they entered through the front door into the kitchen, Calum was not expecting to see Ashton casually leaning against the counter while Liz chopped vegetables at the island. 

"Hello dears, dinner will be ready in about thirty. Luke, could you help peel the potatoes, please?"

Luke grunted and got to work without argument. Cal and Mike both stood there awkwardly, before Ash spoke up.

"Calum, if I could talk to you? Outside?"

"Uh, yeah. Sure," he responded, following him to the back deck. Michael, at the same time, went to help Luke, looking for something to do. 

Seeing as it was winter, all of the deck furniture had been covered or put in storage for the harsh season. Brushing some light snow off of one of the steps, Calum sat down, clearing a space for Ashton as well. It took the older boy a second to sit, but once he did, no one said a word. Both just stared out into the woods for a few minutes. 

"I broke up with Briana today," Ash said, but Calum still said nothing. 

"It was dumb of me to get back together with her. I know that it hurt you, and I'm really sorry for that. I've hurt you a lot, and that's not fair to you. But I've been so scared, Calum. This is so new to me. I've only ever had one relationship, and that was with... her. I obviously know nothing about dating men, I've never even thought about it. The whole soul bond thing was sprung onto the both of us, but I haven't been giving it a chance. And I would like to. Give it a chance, that is. But only if that's something you're comfortable with."

"I don't want to be some sort of rebound or experiment or whatever," Cal commented.

"You wouldn't be!" Ashton was quick to defend, "I want to do this, for real. I promise. We'll need to take things slow... I would like to take things slow. But I care about you, Calum, and I don't want to hurt you anymore."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah," Cal agreed, a smile breaking over his features. Ashton scooted closer to him, pressing their shoulders and legs together. Both were looking at each other, smiling, and Calum felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest it was pounding so fast.

"Can I try something?" Ash whispered, leaning slightly closer. Words caught in his throat, all Calum could do was nod. The alpha brought a hand up to his cheek, brushing his thumb across the soft skin. Both found themselves leaning closer and closer, until suddenly, Cal was experiencing lips on his, and nothing else mattered in the world except this moment. Time was frozen, the air was still, and Calum was pretty sure he could die happy now. 

-

"Can we not tell people, right away?" Calum asked. The two had probably just spent the last fifteen minutes making out, until they were so out of breath that they needed to stop. The soul bond was singing, making both shifters feel warm and energized, like there was lightning on their fingertips. 

"Why not?" Ashton's face dropped slightly.

"I know this is hard for you, and I don't want to dump everything on you all at once. Neither of us are out of the closet at school, and I'm out to the pack but you're not, and I think we just need to take this one step at a time. Plus, don't you think it'll be fun to sneak around for a little bit?" The omega gave him a mischievous grin, and Ashton couldn't help but lean in and steal another kiss. 

"Alright, I'm convinced." 


	9. Beside You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the mothSOS meme is really funny just saying
> 
> unpopular opinion: She's Kinda Hot is okay as a song, but I think the boys have much better songs and I don't actually like SKH. It's not a bad song, but it has aspects of it that are bad, in this essay I will-
> 
> hmu on insta @ americanchemicals as I'm writing this I have 17 whole followers and honestly I just want to talk to someone I'm so bored all the time I need friends

Maybe Calum was paranoid, but he felt like the pack felt like something was up. They were all hanging out at the pack house, because it was Saturday and there wasn't much to do since they were currently in the middle of a snowstorm. 

Michael and Luke were working on homework at the kitchen table, Grace and Ben doing their best to try and help them with the subjects. Side note: Calum had convinced Ashton to let Luke hang out at the pack house even though he wouldn't shift for a couple of months, because he didn't like the thought of his friend being alone. Cas and Andrew were restocking supplies and organizing, moving constantly between the basement and the kitchen. Jack was laying on the ground in front of the fire, snoring softly. Ashton was laying on the couch reading what appeared to be a book on shifters, weird symbols adorning the cover. 

Calum had decided to sit in the chair nearest to the couch that Ash was stretched out on, helping sort first aid kits and restocking them with antiseptic wipes and bandages. Maybe it was suspicious because he typically avoided the alpha like the plague, maybe he should have sat on the other couch since it was farther away from him.

It wasn't like anyone was saying anything, for god's sake, all he was doing was sitting slightly closer to the older boy than usual, even though there was other seating available. Maybe no one even noticed that they were getting along, not having sent each other a dirty look or said a stinging remark in the entire time they had been there. 

"Cal, when you're done with that, I need some help in my room," Ash stated, and that definitely earned them some curious looks from the other pack members.

"S-sure. I'm pretty much done now." Calum closed the kits, setting them carefully to the side before standing up and following Ashton down the hall. After they entered the alpha's bedroom, Ash closed the door quietly, locking it with a soft click. 

Before he knew it, the omega was being pressed against the wall, Ashton's mouth on his. If he weren't being held up, Calum felt like his legs would've given out from underneath him. 

Things got heated in a matter of minutes, and Cal involuntarily let out a moan.

"Shhh, you have to be quiet," Ash whispered, his breath hot on Calum's neck. 

"If you keep this up it'll be very  _hard_ to keep things quiet."

Ashton let out a soft laugh, pulling away from him. "Another time, then."

And with that, the alpha turned and left the room, leaving Calum a wreck.  _Screw him._

-

School got easier now that Cal wasn't as stressed about pack matters. He wasn't particularly good at school, but it was easier to concentrate with a calmer soul bond.

The bond itself, was weird. Calum had been aware of it constantly since he had gotten it, but like his breathing, sometimes if he didn't focus on it he was less aware that it was there. It had also been painful when it was strained, but it had changed drastically now that him and Ashton were getting along, so to say. The more time they spent together, the stronger it got, and from what Ashton had been reading, it was only going to get stronger. 

The bond, according to lore, developed in stages. The stage their bond was in was still very basal. Calum was starting to feel when Ashton felt very strong emotions, like anger or frustration. Sometimes, when they were together, alone, he would feel pure, unadulterated happiness. It was reassuring, knowing that Ashton was legitimately enjoying spending time with him and not pretending. 

Ash had also told him that according to the lore, the more intimate they were with each other, the more emotions they would be able to feel. And, they would also gain the ability to send each other thoughts. The mental image of being more intimate had brought a strong blush to Calum's face, not really sure how to respond to that. 

They had started to be more friendly with each other in front of the pack, but made it clear they were "just friends." 

They were currently both sat next to each other at lunch, Calum mooching off of Ash's lunch because he had forgotten his, when he realized that Ashton appeared to be staring off into the distance. Following his line of sight, he realized the older boy was staring at Briana. 

"Are you still not over her?" he whispered, snapping the alpha out of his reverie.

"I am over her. I was thinking about something else."

"What?" 

"My parents." 

Calum fell quiet. Both of Ashton's parents were out of the picture. His dad had left him when he was younger, and his mom had remarried and ditched Ash for her new family, one that didn't carry a blood curse. It had resulted in Ashton going to live with the pack at the pack house. He knew that it was a sensitive subject for the alpha, and that many people avoided it in case it set off Ash's temper. 

"I would've liked for them to meet you, I think."

Cal observed Ash for a few seconds after that, but the moment had already passed and he was back to focusing on his lunch. 

"I would've liked for my parents to meet you, as well," Calum whispered, tucking into a sandwich, but not missing the small smile that broke across Ashton's face. 

They didn't have their biological family anymore, but both of them had the pack, and more importantly, each other. And in that moment, Calum had a weird, obtrusive thought. 

He was falling in love with Ashton Irwin, and falling hard. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not going to be publishing as frequently, and it's not because I dropped off the face of the earth, it's just because finals are coming up and I have a ton of projects/essays that I need to work on
> 
> I'm honestly so done with higher education I just want to lay in bed and eat pizza without worrying about my future is that too much to ask for


	10. Him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm bad at writing sexytimes so I'm just going to strongly allude

Three Weeks Later

It was Monday morning, and the sun was shining in through Calum's window, irritating his tired eyes. He groaned, moving to roll over, but every muscle in his body screamed in protest at the movement. Clenching his jaw, it took everything in his power to not yell out in pain. Taking in his surroundings, Calum registered that he was in his room at Luke's house, in his bed, and drenched in sweat. 

He laid motionless for a couple of minutes, debating what to do, when Luke barged into his room.

"Dude, we need to get moving or you're going to be late for school," he stated, going to shake Cal's shoulder when he realized the other boy was already awake. 

"Calum, are you good?" 

He tried opening his mouth to reply, and ended up not being able to do even that, another wave of pain rippling through his body. 

"Cal?" Luke tried again, putting a hand on his shoulder. The skin contact was apparently too much, and it felt like he was being branded with a hot iron. It was at that moment, that one Calum Hood, passed the fuck out. 

-

"He has a cold," Cas declared, not having been in the room with the omega for more than ten seconds. 

"Are you sure?" Luke asked her.

"Yup. Go to school, I'll stay here with him. I'll have him peachy-keen in no time." 

Luke left, trusting the healer, who knew for a fact that Calum didn't have a cold. 

"What am I going to do with you?" she asked the unconscious boy. Sitting down next to him but being careful to not physically touch him, she reached out metaphysically to read his energy field. After a few moments, she stopped, pulling out her cell phone and dialing Ashton.

_"Hello?"_

"We have a slight problem. I need you to come to the Hemmings' household now, don't even bother asking questions."

_"I'm at school for once, I need to make-up an English exam that I missed-"_

"Ash, this is important. Something's wrong with Calum."

_"I'll be there in like, ten minutes."_

_-_

"What's wrong?" Ashton was in a panic, but trying to not let it show. 

"You two didn't bother to tell me you started having sex?" The healer gave him a pointed look, hands on her hips. 

"Whoa, Cas- It's not like that. We... haven't. And, that's none of your business, okay?"

"It is my business when you decide to accidentally trigger the mating process and then not finish it. So, I'm going to leave the house, give you a few hours, and when Calum wakes up you're going to seal the deal. Thanks." Cassiel went to leave, when Ash grabbed her wrist to stop her.

"I can't mate him! We're not ready for that!" 

"Ash, he's in pain from the half-bond. If you don't want to mate him, you'll have to wait 24 hours for it to wear off, and it's going to be excruciating for him," she explained.

"Why am I not in pain?"

"Because you're the alpha. It's some pretty sexist magic if you ask me, but since it's your job to complete the ritual, if you decide to pull out someone has to pay the price. Just be glad it's nothing like Rejection, okay sweetheart? Now, I don't think we need to have The Talk, so I'm going to leave."

-

When Calum came to, there was an immense pressure in his skull that felt like it was crushing his brain and eyes simultaneously. His vision was blurry, and he could register someone was looking down at him, but he couldn't make out who it was. The other person was talking to him, but it sounded like he was underwater, and could tell there were vibrations but couldn't decipher what was being said. 

A hand was running through his hair suddenly, and as the pressure in his head lessened slightly, a voice in the back of his head told him it was Ashton in the room with him. 

"I'm so afraid of rushing things with you and scaring you off," Ashton admitted, noticing that Calum had make no acknowledgement he could hear him. Through the bond, he could feel just how much Calum was hurting. He wouldn't be surprised if all that hurt was overwhelming him. 

The soul bond was one thing in itself, a preliminary thing that came to both Ash and Calum naturally. However, the mating bond was a whole 'nother thing in itself. Any shifter could form a mating bond with another, the only prerequisite being that it was consensual for both parties. It was a process involving a mixture of love and... a certain level of physical attraction (because Ashton couldn't think about sex with his Cal being like this), finished off with a mating bite to seal the bond. Apparently, the two had set off the first component of the ritual, and the bond did not like going uncompleted. 

Laying down next to Calum and wrapping his arms around him, Ash prodded the soul bond, and like opening a floodgate he was hit with an immense level of pain. Submerging himself in the feeling, he searched for any semblance of Calum's consciousness in the whole mess of it all, and came up empty. Pulling himself out, Ash felt like he had been doused with a bucket of ice cold water.

"I keep causing you pain, and I wonder how healthy this relationship could ever be for you if all I'm able to do is bring you pain. I hate seeing you like this, and I don't want to hurt you anymore. I don't know if it's better to wait the twenty-four hours or... I can't force this bond onto you, even if it started out as consensual. I don't want you to feel trapped by my side for the rest of your life, or make you feel like you never had a choice."

"You-" Calum suddenly spoke, his voice barely a whisper, "are an idiot." 

Ashton was speechless, watching as Cal stared directly into his eyes, his own brimming with tears. "Please," the omega begged, "please. I love you."

"I love you, too." Ashton was crying, and Calum was crying, but they were both happy despite the circumstances. Wanting to make this as quick as possible for Cal, Ash moved to support Calum's head with one hand, the other resting on his shoulder. Resting his mouth on the crook of the omega's shoulder, he sighed before extending his canines, biting into the firm flesh, his mouth filling with blood. 

The bond exploded with emotion, the pain dissipating. As Ashton pulled away, he watched as Cal's speed-healing stitched the wound, but left a pink crescent-shaped scar in place. Staring into Cal's eyes, he noticed there were a warm chocolate brown, some spots a darker brown than others. He ran a thumb over the new scar, and suddenly Calum was on top of him, pushing him down, lips on lips. 

And, as they collapsed side-by-side on the bed almost an hour later, both panting and smiling and looking into each other's eyes... Well, for one, Calum was pretty much over his cold. And everything else was right in the universe. 

"How did we trigger the mating process, anyways?" Calum asked.

"Apparently the rules of mating count oral as sex."

"Fantastic. And didn't you assure me twice that we would be fine?" 

"You really want to complain?"

"No. I love you."

"And I love you."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back bitches, finals sucked and I am not ready for next semester but I have a few weeks of break to pretend that school isn't happening and that's swell
> 
> also ashton's red hair is attractive and I like it don't @ me


	11. Youngblood

"I've called you all to this pack meeting to share some important news. You'll probably have questions, but please try to hold them until I'm done." Ashton stood at the center of the circle of pack members scattered around him. Calum was standing to his right, giving off strong nervous energy.

"When Calum was welcomed into the pack, his shift was... abnormal, to say the least. At the time, a select few pack members came to learn that Calum is my true mate. While I battled this notion for quite some time, I'm here today a changed man. Changed in a good way, changed because of love. Cal, sweetheart?" 

Calum shuffled his feet, his cheeks dusted pink from blushing. He couldn't bring himself to say anything, didn't even know what to say. This was the hardest announcement he's ever had to make, and it wasn't even that hard in concept (that's what she said). 

Instead of saying anything, Cal turned and buried his face in Ashton's neck, shielding himself from the eyes of the group. They wouldn't outright say anything if they were against the relationship, this was their alpha they were talking about. But he was still getting to know his other pack members, just starting to be accepted by them. 

"What he means to say is that we've entered a relationship and mated. Calum Hood is officially our pack omega, and I expect everyone to welcome him to this new position with open arms, or Cassiel will turn your eyeballs into soup," Ashton threatened, with a light tone.

Off to the side, Cas could be heard whispering to Andrew, "it's a new spell that I've mastered this week. I'm still trying to figure out how to reverse it." And God, what a terrifying woman. 

Not knowing what to expect, Calum spared a glance at his pack mates, only to be met with wide smiles and happy faces. 

"Congrats, you two!" someone hollered, and others began to wolf-whistle. 

"See? You had nothing to be worried about," Ash whispered, pressing a kiss to his temple. 

-

Running through the woods, Calum basked in the feeling of wind rushing through his fur, of his paws pounding against the soft forest floor. Sunlight peaked through the treetops and gave warmth below, causing overhead branches to cast light shadows here and there. Out of all the things of being a shifter, this was likely one of the best perks, running unadulterated with nothing stopping him or holding him back. 

To his left ran Ashton, keeping pace with him perfectly. Okay, scratch that, Ash was the best thing about being a shifter. It was what had brought them together, and what had started out as a curse had turned into a blessing. What had started as a messy beginning, with a lot of push and pull and give and take, they had finally found their balance with each other. 

 _Getting sappy on me?_ Ashton teased over the bond, and Cal bumped their shoulders together, making them both stumble for a second before they regained their footing.

They ended up at the clearing by the river, both shifting to their human form and going to stand in the sand. It was hot from the sun's rays, scalding the bottoms of their feet, and Calum squealed as he ran to the water to cool them off, Ash not far behind. 

"Promise me something?" he asked, turning to the alpha.

"Yeah?"

"That this is real? I'm not in a coma or making this all up in my head? That we're real and you'll love me 'til the day I die?"

"I'll do you one better. I'll love you into the afterlife," Ash promised, pulling the younger into a hug, "Calum Thomas Hood, I am powerless without you. You're my better half, and you're as real for me as the sun and moon and stars. Hell, you're my gravity, holding me to the Earth with undeniable force. I don't think it's possible for either of us to exist without the other." Ashton had tears streaming down his face, and Cal did as well, but neither made a move to wipe them away. 

"And what did you say earlier about me being the sappy one?"

"Oh, shut up."

"I love you."

"And I, you."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt like this was at a point where I needed to finish it. I've had terrible writer's block for weeks, and as my last semester of college approaches (yikes) I felt like it's not possible for me to carry this with me. This isn't exactly where I wanted this fic to go or how I wanted it to end, but like the boys I need a hiatus (double yikes).
> 
> Thank you for reading, hope you have a good 2019!


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